Confessions of a FRUSTRATED SINGER

KOIE SINGING:
when will I see you again?
You left with no goodbye,
Not a single word was said,
No final kiss to seal any scene,
I had no idea of the state we were in,

I know I have a fickle  heart and a bitterness,
And a wandering eye, and heaviness in my head  -- Don't You Remember by Adele

I so love listening to music. whenever i'm bored i opt to play songs in my phone and eat and stare blankly and smile. so try to imagine how i look like. yeah i know it is strange to see someone staring blankly and smiling at the same time. i don't care what others would say. though they often tell me i look cute and some would even say i look stupid, well thank you for that compliment guys. but no one really asked me why  i always end up doing that. well i think they aren't interested. anyhow, just to be honest in times like that i am imagining my self having a good voice. there is nothing wrong with imagining right?


KOIE SINGING:
Now everybody asks me why I'm smiling out from ear to ear.
(They say love hurts)
But I know
(It's gonna take the real work)
Nothing's perfect, but it's worth it after fighting through my fears
And finally you put me first -- Love On Top by Beyonce


My mom and my dad knows how to sing, but what the heck is wrong with me??????

I am but a normal teenager. i have a lot of insecurities. i always have this "how i wish" thought. like how i wish i'm physically overwhelming, i'm tall; i can smile like those models in toothpaste commercials, this and that and this and that. yeah i know these are just superficial thing but if we try to look deeper these superficiality complements a girl. seriously, if there is one thing i wish i have, without second thoughts, it would be a GOOD VOICE. all caps for emphasis. good enough to launch a thousand battleships.

i have always wanted to sing in front of a crowd.sometimes i can even feel there is a voice within me that urges me to sing my heart out and let others know that i, too, know how to sing. let's admit it i know how to sing, almost everyone does, except that i have my own tune. some may find it annoying while others would appreciate it and honestly i don't know if they really do. the hell i care. we have our individual muses right? so just bare with me. you know what i'm just feeding my ego here. another self service policy observed!

if i only knew how to sing then i'll do a lot of good things. i will use my voice to achieve world peace. yeah that's so beauty queen! my voice will serve as a protection for mother earth against the destruction that we, cruel humans, have made. i will travel the world and inflict change to every individual that i meet. it is given that change is constant and that is what we need in order to meet the crazy demands of our world. by the power of my voice, i will keep the people abreast with the current issues that is happening for them to make sound judgment, and that is so masscom!  my ethereal voice will give inspiration to those who are seeking comfort, to those who have same feeling as mine. my voice will be the conscience lurking within the minds of every criminal. i will not stop on hunting them until they pay the price for the crime they had committed. through my voice i will protect the rights of every individual and serve justice the it should be served. with my voice i will be the most notorious villain and track down those people who have nothing to do in this world but spread their evil desires. like am i really serious with that? eh?

seriously, i will use my voice to inspire every woman who lacks confidence. my voice will serve as her innate mentor in order for her to face today's discriminating world.empowering women will be my number one task. and with this i will sing ...

KOIE SINGING:
Who run the world? Girls!
Who run this motha? Girls!
Who run the world? Girls!

Some of them men think they freak this like we do
But no they don't
Make your checks come at they neck,
Disrespect us no they won't 
...
Boy im just playing, come here baby
Hope you still like me, If you hate me
My persuasion can build a nation
Endless power, our love we can devour
You'll do anything for me -- Run the World by Beyonce

sadly, when your dream is near on its climax you wake up. that's it. end of my dreams. if i only know how to sing then i would certainly do everything.